When Oceans Rise

I am unfortunately quite familiar with struggle. Due to pride and ignorance, I often have endured struggle on my own, citing "If it's MY struggle, then ONLY I have to deal with this." What a lonely place that is! I frequently found myself angry with God because the world around me was just getting too deep and I couldn't feel his life vest around me... I couldn't see the light house... I couldn't feel anyone reaching to help me resurface. In my effort to be kinder to myself, I know that much of this perception of God was a sheer misunderstanding. I felt that it was only responsibility to give give give, so I rarely gave others an opportunity to bless me. I rarely opened up and shared my weakness because I was terrified of living a "taker" life. But pride played a large part... because lets face it, we live in a world where weakness needs to be fixed. We can work out longer, eat EVEN healthier, do NEW things, try harder... when was the last time that you overheard someone share their struggle and you DIDN'T automatically attempt to find a solution for them in your mind, or out loud?

 Is weakness automatically a negative? Are we afraid of feeling weak?

 Using the analogy of the ocean: If you were swimming along, blissfully enjoying your time in the water, then out of no where the ocean began rising and you could no longer reach the ocean floor... does this mean you are weak, or simply that you need reinforcement? You need to adjust? You weren't prepared... but unless you experience that new challenge, you have no idea how to then stretch yourself. Your limits haven't been tested.

 I hope you don't hear me saying that offering support or encouragement is BAD. My goodness, if you know that someone is struggling and are able to be a light into their darkness, please do it! I feel that the true message I have here today is that we all NEED to experience a rising ocean every once in a while. We all NEED to be challenged. To learn to ask for help. To learn to rely on God. To learn to trust the person God has been raising us to be.

 Why is empowerment such a steady message throughout my blog posts?

 I never knew what I was truly capable of. I don't mean by human standards. I am a firm believer that God has a calling for each of our lives and that many of us accidentally or intentionally live outside of that calling. I believe that the struggles we endure and the bad things that happen to us in this life are meant to challenge us to choose to be the person God created us to be, or someone else.

 I think of Job. He lost everything that he was known for, EXCEPT his faith. Satan thought that Job was only faithful so long as his life was easy. He faced temptations of many kind during that dark time... but in the end, his life was restored ten fold. But did all of that richness and love that he was re-gifted take away from the dark chapter? Did having new sons and daughters take away the pain of losing his other sons and daughters? While this isn't an item that's addressed in the bible, I have to pitch a tent here for a few minutes. If you are reading this and you are someone who has endured a dark chapter, or are enduring a dark chapter... It doesn't have to define you, but it does become a part of your story. Job lived on to be exceedingly wealthy and had incredibly beautiful sons and daughters. But he will also always be the man who lost everything but stayed faithful. What you have endured makes you a spiritual badass. There is something about that word that just sums up my feelings on this topic so completely. You have endured the good, the bad and the ugly. When the oceans rose, you survived. No matter how you dwell on your weakness or on how poorly you handled your "dog paddling" chapter, remember how you endured: God's strength in you. It wasn't your strength alone, it was your soul's primitive instinct to embrace who God created you to be.

 We don't always handle that raw emotional place with the most grace. Some of us rely on God with ease, some of us kick and scream, feeling exposed and wait until the last second to truly rely on Him. The measure of our faith is not simply measured by how gracefully we maintained it... but by how humbly we are willing to execute it. When ocean's rise my soul will rest in your embrace... for I am Yours and You are mine.